Threadgold's 'Thoroughgrip' Garterettes
I found this on the h2g2 site:
A peer was stalking a roebuck
In a misty Scottish glen.
BANG! went his well-charged rifle.
A miss, then BANG! again.
"TWO misses", roared his lordship,
as his stockings trailed in the wet,
"Serves me right for not wearing
a Thoroughgrip Garterette".
A peer was stalking a roebuck
In a misty Scottish glen.
BANG! went his well-charged rifle.
A miss, then BANG! again.
"TWO misses", roared his lordship,
as his stockings trailed in the wet,
"Serves me right for not wearing
a Thoroughgrip Garterette".
apeer.mp3 | |
File Size: | 263 kb |
File Type: | mp3 |
A dustman was emptying dustbins
In the heart of a horrible slum,
Where no Viscount's white foot had e'er trodden
And no Marquess would venture to come.
How taut were the socks of that dustman
Would show that he didn't forget
The people's best friend in all troubles
Threadgold's Thoroughgrip Garterette.
In the heart of a horrible slum,
Where no Viscount's white foot had e'er trodden
And no Marquess would venture to come.
How taut were the socks of that dustman
Would show that he didn't forget
The people's best friend in all troubles
Threadgold's Thoroughgrip Garterette.
dustbin.mp3 | |
File Size: | 296 kb |
File Type: | mp3 |
I am indebted to Mr Mike Bye of Ontario for the following deathless ditties:
The scene is an elegant soiree,
somewhere in Belgrave Square.
The Tenor is singing "Speak to me, Thora"
but Thora, alas, is elsewhere.
She's eloped with a dastardly Bounder;
a note left says, "Please forget
for I've fallen in love with the Captain
and his Thoroughgrip Garterette.
The scene is an elegant soiree,
somewhere in Belgrave Square.
The Tenor is singing "Speak to me, Thora"
but Thora, alas, is elsewhere.
She's eloped with a dastardly Bounder;
a note left says, "Please forget
for I've fallen in love with the Captain
and his Thoroughgrip Garterette.
The scene is the Cricklewood Palais,
the dancers are taking the floor,
The favourite is young Doris Eckersley,
partnered by Alf....Number 54
In the Waltz, she's simply divine;
in the Foxtrot, she's perfectly sweet;
but the Judges won't give Alf the Championship Cup
with the tops of his socks 'round his feet!
(pause)
Threadgold's Thoroughgrip Garterettes....as worn by Peter West!
the dancers are taking the floor,
The favourite is young Doris Eckersley,
partnered by Alf....Number 54
In the Waltz, she's simply divine;
in the Foxtrot, she's perfectly sweet;
but the Judges won't give Alf the Championship Cup
with the tops of his socks 'round his feet!
(pause)
Threadgold's Thoroughgrip Garterettes....as worn by Peter West!